Temple prep - "Toward the Veil"

The following text is taken from the pamphlet "Preparing to Enter the Holy Temple" (2002) and annotated by me.

We must gain some feeling for why we build temples, and why the ordinances are required of us. Feeling, not knowledge. Feelings are more reliable. Thereafter we are continually instructed and enlightened on matters of spiritual importance. We're only continually enlightened if we continually have the same banal questions. Anything more requires something a little more dialectic than what the temple offers (a set script). Students don't learn from a teacher who gives the exact same lesson every day of the year and never stops the lesson to see if the students have questions. It comes line upon line, precept upon precept, until we gain a fullness of light and knowledge. People, there are no additional lines beyond what is included in the script. You're required to fill in all the gaps but no one will ever check your work to make sure you've filled things in correctly. Your conclusions about the meaning of the temple are likely to be extremely idiosyncratic and significantly different from other members. This becomes a great protection to us—to each of us personally. Personally, yes, because you always feel you're right, but certainly not collectively. Can you imagine the kinds of heated arguments that would ensue if members actually had to discuss their long researched (through feelings only) temple epiphanies? We would eat each other alive in a giant feeding fest of heartfelt disagreement. It is a protection also for the Church. Most definitely! If members actually talked about the temple openly the emperor's nakedness would be plain for all to see.

No work is more of a protection to this Church than temple work and the genealogical research which supports it. What? How does genealogical work protect the Church? By giving it a research organ that actually does credible work unlike the moronic apologists over at BYU and FAIR? No work is more spiritually refining. Whatever that means. I would think that Jesus would argue for exercising charity. No work we do gives us more power. Man, you're power hungry to say the least! You keep going off about all the power the temple gives you. Relax. Accept that you're a mortal like the rest of us. No work requires a higher standard of righteousness. Keep fanning our self-righteous ego! It feels so good!

Our labors in the temple cover us with a shield and a protection, both individually and as a people. You've already explained that the individual shield is a layer of cotton-poly blend, but what's this collective shield? A host of angels? A bubble like force field? A veil of ignorance?

It is in the ordinances of the temple that we are placed under covenant to Him—it is there we become the covenant people. Because baptism by water and the Holy Spirit aren't covenants with God? What about the sacrament? Who is that covenant with?

If we will accept the revelation concerning temple ordinance work, if we will enter into our covenants without reservation or apology, the Lord will protect us. Protect us from what? What the hell are you talking about? We will receive inspiration sufficient for the challenges of life. That sounds like minimal inspiration, which is definitely what I got during my years of activity.

The work relating to the temples is true. Huh? What does that even mean? It was revealed from beyond the veil and revelation continues. Which veil, the temple veil or the veil of forgetfulness? If you mean the temple veil you should know the 5 points of contact and all that came from Freemasons, not God. If you mean the veil of forgetfulness, you're going to have to explain a few things like how the hell Elijah and Elias were different people and why anyone should consider plural marriage a divine and holy practice.

Revelation may come to each member of the Church individually concerning temple work. It has to because the Church won't teach about it anywhere in any depth or detail. May we all take the initiative and do a few Internet searches about the temple in our quest for understanding.

So come to the temple—come and claim your blessings. They're the unspecific blessings we'll work the whole rest of our lives trying to identify. It is a sacred work. It is what you want it to be, I guess. I actually dared to want something otherworldly and beautiful. What I got was human and mundane. I doubted my doubts, but I could only delude myself for so long before letting it go.

Temple prep - New Era "Prepared, Empowered, Transformed"

By Pang Kau Yang. Text found here.

Before I entered the temple for the first time, I always felt a special connection to it from reading and learning about it, studying my patriarchal blessing, and hearing the testimonies of others. Not from all the crazy Primary songs where you say how much you love the temple and are definitely going in some day, or the fact that your parents plastered the walls of your home with pictures of the temple and pointed it out enthusiastically every time you passed one, or all the church talks and lessons that hard sell you on the temple?

I committed myself to prepare so that one day I’d be ready and worthy to enter. Nice job, Pang. The LDS Church is very happy for you. Even before receiving my temple endowment, I’d drive three hours just to sit at the temple grounds to pray, ponder, and write in my journal. You didn't have a nice wood or lake or something closer by? Each time I left, I felt a greater sense of strength and confidence that I could face the challenges and struggles in my life. Feelings feel best when they feel good.

Throughout my youth, I’d do baptisms for the dead. Those experiences contributed to my testimony of temples and the ordinances performed in them. You mean the ordinance of baptism? You had no idea what the other ordinances were if all you were doing is baptisms. I thought that if just being on the temple grounds and doing baptisms for the dead felt so good, then it must feel even more wonderful to receive my own ordinances in the temple. That's definitely the impression the Church wants to impart, friend.

On the day I received my endowment, my family and I ran into a few obstacles before we got to the temple. Satan put those obstacles there. Don't doubt it for a second! But despite the challenges we had getting there, once I was inside I felt that nothing mattered but the sweet and peaceful feeling of joy that comes as we perform temple ordinances. Wait, back up. You're not even going to tell us what the obstacles were?? Are we just supposed to fill in the blank there? What the hell? Now about feeling joy... what if I (or someone else) don't feel that? One of the greatest feelings I had that day was, “I made it! I know this is where I am supposed to be.” Right, and no one had prepped you at all to think like that. Are you a puppet?

I knew in my heart that I’d done everything I could to be worthy and ready to receive what Heavenly Father had prepared for me. But you had no clue what "had been prepared" for you, so you couldn't have known that the Freemasons, not God, had prepared most of it. I could feel His love and His gratitude for my desire to follow Him and make and keep covenants so that I can return to live with Him someday. You mean baptism? Jesus said you need baptism. I don't know why God would require baptism, but that's what Jesus said. If you mean something other than baptism, no one in the New Testament or Book of Mormon would have agreed with you. Jesus included. In other words, you don't need to know the patriarchal grip to return to God. The only thing that handshake's good for is getting you 15 minutes in the Celestial Room.

I’m so grateful for all those who played a role in helping me prepare to enter the temple. Did anyone tell you what covenants you'd be making or how to tie your sash before you went in? No, absolutely not. I’m grateful for the Book of Mormon, which helped me receive spiritual guidance and nourishment to be prepared to make and keep temple covenants. WTF? The Book of Mormon says NOTHING about the current LDS temple rites. My experiences in the temple will always hold a special place in my heart. Those experiences gave me strength when I served my mission, and they continue to give me strength to face challenges with the hope and faith I need to endure. I can still look back and remember the wonderful, peaceful feelings I felt in the temple that first time. That's good. Really, it is. But do you understand that people draw strength and encouragement from all sorts of things? A lock of hair, a movie, the words of a friend, a certain smell, cleaning and organizing stuff, stand up comedians, a pet, reading, sun tanning, buying some new shit, etc.? What happens when someone else says that they don't get peace from attending the temple?

I love the temple. I know that it’s the house of the Lord. Did you see him there or just read "House of the Lord" above the entrance? Why would God live in something as uncomfortable as a temple? I mean, there are no beds and the pool is very, very small. It’s where we can go to perform ordinances and help others who have passed on receive the blessings of eternal life and exaltation. People who have passed on without ever hearing about Jesus don't need those things, The Book of Mormon says so. It’s where I continue to go to receive strength, guidance, and knowledge. It’s where I go to feel close to Heavenly Father and feel of His love. So is it OK with you if the 99.9% of the world who isn't Mormon goes somewhere else? All you've told us here is that the temple works for you. Can you tell us any details about the temple itself for anyone out there who might actually be curious, or do you prefer that we ask Google? Google upbraideth not!

Temple prep - New Era "Partaking of Eternal Blessings"

Ryan Montgomery, 18, Oregon, USA

Receiving my endowment was the most meaningful experience I’ve had thus far in my life. As I entered the celestial room, I was overcome with a sense of happiness. Feelings, nothing but sweet, delicious feelings! My parents are divorced, but when I entered the celestial room, they were both able to be there with me. Let's at least hope they're still sealed to each other. I felt Heavenly Father’s love for me and for my parents. More feelings! :)

The endowment session itself was unforgettable. Tell me about it. I’ve come to understand that Christ is central to everything we do. Was that not clear to you before? Maybe Mormons really aren't Christian after all. The covenants we make in the temple are focused on Him. No, they're not. They're focused on your money and your genitals. The endowment ceremony is focused on Him. It's definitely more focused on Adam, Elohim and Satan. Even the temple structure and decor are designed to teach us about Christ. Symbols of Him are everywhere in the house of the Lord. Lot's of fish, vines, lambs and crosses then?

It’s not a coincidence that we’re instructed to take upon ourselves the name of Christ and include Him in our everyday lives. You mean at baptism, right? Becoming a Christlike individual is our goal here in this mortal, trial-filled world. You learned to tell enigmatic stories that piss people off? The temple is a place to exhibit Christlike love, learn about Him, and more fully become the Christ-centered person He hopes and longs for us to become. Where do you ever exhibit Christlike love - the prayer circle?? All you learn about him is that he is Jehovah of the Old Testament, but most members know that before they go through. Do you honestly think that memorizing magic words and handshakes is what Christ was all about?

The endowment, aside from being one of the most beautiful experiences in my life, is a necessity in order to fully comprehend how we can return to our Father in Heaven. Now you're talking about the Masonic signs, yes? The endowment has given me the power and knowledge essential to partake of eternal blessings. Yes, of course, never doubt that you'll breeze right into the Celestial Kingdom with what you've learned!

Temple prep - New Era "Making Important Covenants"

Allie Bradford, 20, Utah, USA

I received my mission call in January to the Cape Verde Praia Mission! I’m really excited about my mission, but I was just as excited to be able to go through the temple and receive my endowment. Probably because you had no idea what to expect for either the temple or your mission.

Both my bishop and my stake president reminded me that the temple is not merely a stepping-stone to the mission. Did you need that reminder? I can't imagine why you would. The covenants I make in the temple are literally vital for my salvation; a mission is not. I'm not sure temple covenants are vital. New Testament writers never brought them up and neither did the Jaredites, Mulekites or Lehites. Only Joseph Smith brings them up and only then after he became a Freemason.

I prepared to go to the temple by focusing on my baptismal covenants, reading the booklet Preparing to Enter the Holy Temple, reading my scriptures daily, and praying a lot. Baptismal covenants cover everything, so that's good. The only thing the temple adds are promises of secrecy. The temple prep booklet is worthless. It didn't tell you a damned thing that you didn't already know and neither did what you read in the scriptures or felt when you prayed. To truly prepare for what you'll do, you should have Googled the endowment ceremony or watched it on YouTube. Or both. Then you'd know what you were getting into. I felt like I was about as prepared as I could have been, without actually knowing specifically what was going to happen. That's totally how I felt too! Man, was I wrong.

I feel like I’ve been preparing for my endowment my whole life. You have been. Remember all those Primary songs and that eternal marriage talk? I wasn’t really nervous about it, even though I still didn’t know what to expect. Yes! We have so much in common! I had my parents, other family members, and temple workers escorting me the whole time, so I was never alone. Never alone, yet barely informed of anything.

Before I went to the temple, I got the same advice from a lot of people: Don’t worry about trying to learn or remember it all the first time, don’t stress about the symbolism, and don’t worry if you don’t understand everything; just focus on feeling the Spirit. That what I was told too. Unfortunately I just felt uncomfortable. That’s just what I did, and my first time in the temple was a very good experience. The Spirit was so strong. I guess this is where you and I differ. I felt confused and wondered why no one had properly informed me of what this experience would be like. So who's feelings are most valid, yours or mine?

The things that happen in the temple are different from the way we worship outside the temple. Because they're stolen from the Freemasons and have absolutely nothing to do with Christian worship. But the Spirit is the same, and that’s the most important thing. It didn't feel the same to me! I felt like I was in an entirely different church. When we’re worthy and prepared to be there, we can truly feel God’s presence in His house. Polly want a cracker? I’m so grateful that I’ve been able to receive my endowment and make those important covenants. Your baptismal covenant already covered that shit, yo! I look forward to going back again and again. Totally! Until you get bored out of your mind.

Crucible of Doubt

A kind and well-intentioned couple, Terry and Fiona Givens, both scholars and both active, believing members of the LDS Church, has written a book for me. It comes several years too late, but I'm still a little bit interested. Mormonism is so completely shattered, in my opinion, that when I hear a claim that I can once again fit all the pieces together again my morbid curiosity is piqued. Additionally I've heard enough positive things about the Givens that I felt it only polite to listen to their 3 hour and 15 minute sales pitch.

Unfortunately I couldn't buy the Givens' arguments and won't be buying the book, which was the result of a recent fireside tour, which was the result of reasonable success from a previous book they had written.

After having listened to the entire Mormon Stories interview my main questions are:

1. If prophets are just like the rest of us then why should we look to them for answers concerning God's will? (I love how they insist on ignoring John Dehlin's question about whether or not it's okay to criticize our upper management.)

2. How do we have any trust in the Gospel text as being valid Jesus material? If we're going to undermine the spoken and written words of imperfect prophets what are we to do with the teachings of Mr. Perfect? Do we take them with a grain of salt because they were written by a bunch of assholes and corrupted over time? Do we only accept the teachings and events described by at least two of the Gospel writers (you know, that whole "by the mouth of two or three witnesses" thing)?

3. In all Fiona's admonishing against hero worship she fails to mention even once our worship of a heroic character named Jesus. How is she so sure that we haven't overblown the case for Jesus the same way we have for our various prophets, especially in light of the fact that our basis for turning Jesus into a mighty hero worthy of our worship are the less than reliable words of prophets, who are pretty much just like us?

4. Why should anyone take the Givens' approach seriously when it directly contradicts our Mormon canon?

5. Terryl Givens bases his entire argument on some kind of bizarre dichotomy between "the heart" and "the intellect". How is anyone supposed to take that seriously? We are not divided up between this mysterious heart and a non-mysterious, logical brain. "The heart" works for Terry the same way the sky worked for early belief in God. It's the only place to hide (as long as you continue to ignore science).

So the book comes out soon. Maybe it has answers to all of these questions, but admittedly I have my doubts.

Heavenly fatherliness #3 - Coping with emotions

According to popular wisdom, a good father must be able to express his feelings in a healthy, balanced way.

Talk to your typical Mormon and he'll tell you that the Heavenly Father feels love, pity, disappointment, wrath, and maybe a couple of other emotions, and because he's perfect he certainly never behaves badly when in a particular mood.

I say no way. If we take the stories of the Old and New Testaments as representative of God's standard behavior we have to conclude that he's anything but stable. It takes every effort you can muster to keep the Big Man from flying off the handle. Remember when he killed everyone on Earth except Noah and his small family? Remember how he killed Uzzah for trying to be helpful? Remember how he's supposedly responsible for earthquakes and pestilence and famine and all that sort of thing because that's how he expresses his anger toward people who don't obey His Holy Laws? When's the last time you met a father like that and didn't call the cops on him? Or at least think he was a total piece of shit?

But we should back up a bit here because I have a problem with the whole idea that God the Father feels anything at all. How can an omniscient being with a perfect spirit/soul (and a perfect body) be effected by any event or collection of events taking place in the universe that he himself made and utterly controls? If God has known since literally forever everything that we will have done in our lives doesn't that kind of soften the punch, if not totally neutralize it? If God's being is so complete (i.e. perfect) and integral how could anything we ever do move him in any direction, either towards happiness or sadness, peace or violence, contentment or frustration? What exactly is an omnipotent being supposed to be susceptible to?

Whether Our Father's the abusive shithead you read about in Scriptures, or the untouchable self-subsiting One beyond our petty emotions, I can only conclude that he doesn't sound like any dad I'd like to have.

*These attributes represent the popular thoughts of Ask Men’s Jullian Marcus, examiner.com’s Tanya Tringali, and Open Talk Magazine’s Glenn Silvestre as per their respective articles on what makes a good father.